Good Morning.
Beyond the usual habits of smoking, drinking, and gambling, there are several others that come to mind, including some that have cropped up in recent years.
1. Fooling with one's hair. This is almost always done by women who may be just pushing away a stray clump out of the
eyes or the age-old nervously twirling a strand thing. Men who pull out a comb all the time are concerning. There's
something going on here besides a habit.
2. Slurping, often because the beverage is hot, like soup, or in an attempt to get the last drop of soda at the bottom of a fast
food cup with a great deal more ice than soda.
3. Leaving clothes, socks, and towels in a heap on the bathroom or bedroom floor. This is usually done by men, the dears.
4. Taking up two parking spaces. This may be done by an old person who can't see the lines and shouldn't be licensed to
drive, by someone in a hurry, or by the joker with a fancy vehicle that apparently deserves to be protected from other,
less fancy vehicles.
5. Ignoring the Express Lane sign. This involves unloading 25 items rather than the designated 10 onto the conveyor belt.
At my grocery store, it can also mean checking out a cart full of produce, meat, frozen goods, and a bag of dog food in the
adjacent liquor department because it's closer to where the violator parked his or her car under a sign that says 15
Minute Limit.
6. Leaving a lousy tip for great service. This one applies to the stingy old guy who probably thinks the minimum wage is
too high, especially for a single mother working two jobs, one of which is to serve his food hot, keep his water and
coffee topped off, and tell him to have a nice day.
7. Telling everyone to have a nice day.
8. Littering. This involves everything from pitching a lit cigarette out a car window to leaving a picnic area or the Little
League bleachers strewn with food wrappers and beverage cups. This is when you wish there was a cop nearby, but he or she is off writing a ticket for the guy with the fancy vehicle who decided to park in a handicapped spot this time
around.
9. Texting in situations that require personal attention. Save this activity for when you're walking down the street
in a baseball cap worn backwards.
10. Wearing big jeans that droop in back with a view of the continental divide. This is no longer a plumbing problem.
11. Hogging the food on a buffet table. This can involve taking half a dozen shrimp, standing at the onion dip and dunking
a bunch of chips twice per chip, or slipping a few rolls into the purse, usually done by someone over the age of 75.
12. Procrastinating. This one comes in handy to avoid the dentist, the tax accountant, an annoying relative, housework,
fall leaf raking, a colonoscopy, or marriage counseling.
13. Galloping the fingernails. This is the rhythm God originally bestowed upon a horse with hooves.
14. Burping in public. Okay in Japan but considered unappetizing elsewhere.
15. The clinking the glass with a utensil at the wedding thing. This is more of a custom than a habit and the apparently
more mature version of Spin the Bottle with one person.
Best regards,
Elisabeth
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